Foreword by James Lardner Introduction A Note to Readers Ring Lardner Tells His Sad, Sad Story to the World 1. Getting Started South Bend Has Cause to Be Proud of Athletic Record the Past Year Memoirs of a Baseball Scribe (Part 1) Memoirs of a Baseball Scribe (Part 2) Twenty-Six Cubs Will Be Taken on Southern Journey The Peerless Leader Takes Charge Record Crowd Opens Forbes Field P.L.''s Team Leads Arabella to the Altar Pullman Pastimes: Frank Schulte Is His Own Entertainer Pullman Pastimes: Dawson''s Reform Credited to Two Cubs The Rustlers Go Marching Through Georgia 2. Baseball The First Game Ring''s All-Stars Peaches Graham: Nine Men in One Ty Cobb''s Inside Baseball Ping Bodie''s Monologue Matty Mordecai Brown: The Reporter''s Friend Noisy John Kling Casting Stones with Rollie Zeider Casey in the Field How to Pitch to Babe Ruth Baseball Poems The World Serious 1909 Exhausted Tigers Extend Series 1912 The Tears of Christy Mathewson 1915 A Plea for Help A Rainy Day in Philadelphia 1916 Your Correspondent Sizes Up the Series Lardner Story Starts as Verse, Turns to Prose as Fattens Purse Inning by Inning with the Red Sox and Robins Nothing Happened 1917 Report from Behind Enemy Lines The Modern Voltaire 1918 18 Holes 1919 A Hot Tip from the Umpire Kid''s Strategy Goes Amuck as Jake Doesn''t Die A Dirty Finger on the Ball 1920 No Need to Bribe Brooklyn Ring Splits Double-Header 1921 Lardner Hitting 1., Peaved at Weatherman Scribes Saved from Overflow of Brains 1922 The Most Important World Series in History The Fur Coat Is Already Bought Mr. Lardner Corrects a Wrong Impression It Looks Bad for the Three Little Lardner Kittens Yanks Lose, But Lardner Kittens Spared 1923 Fans Agrog as Series Opens Only One Team Could Lose that Game 1925 Blizzards and Politics Hit Pirate Punch 1927 Ring Hears the Game He Is Seeing Some Final Thoughts on the Game Oddities of Bleacher Bugs Kill the Umpire Why Ring Stopped Covering Baseball Br''er Rabbit Ball 3. Ring Goes to War A War Ballad Why I Can''t Fight A Free Trip to Europe A Message to Sec.

Baker Daddy''s Alibi Ring Hears Government Plans to Scare Mexico Serve Your Country with a Minimum of Effort A Good Tip to Friend Al E''en War So Grim Refuses to Dim Humor of Him A Ball Game in France Setting Out for the Front On Being Bombed A Letter to Home Back in Les Etats Unis What''s the Matter with Kaiser Bill? Wake Travel Guide (European Branch) The Do-Without Club Ring Can''t Smile at War''s End 4. Football The Perils of Being a Football Writer Michigan vs. Harvard: A Personal Odyssey A Letter How I''ll Get That Story A Persunal Appeal A Friend Indeed Perseverance Wins He Has It All Planned Out A Fresh Guy Where There''s Real Sport Please Don''t Go and Ruin It All Blue Monday at Michigan Wolverines Off for East Today; Big Squad to Go Yost''s Squad Loses Outfit; Railroad Fails to Drop Off Baggage, Handicapping Workout Yost''s Cripples Meet Harvard in East Today Luck Favors Harvard in Beating Michigan 5. Politics If You Don''t Know What He Writes About You Have Nothing on Him Ring Takes the "Pomp" Out of Pompey Key-Noting with Lardner The United States of Old Glory Ring Is Through with Conventions But Fielder Jones is O.K. Me for Mayor A Taxing Situation Starve with Hoover or Feast with Lardner Ring May Run with Debs on Prison Ticket Ring Says the Race Is Between Himself and Cobb It Looks Like a Stampede to Lardner Vice=Presidency Dressing for the Inauguration Is Some Job Simplicity Reigns in Washington Harding Inaugural Is Simps'' Delight Presidential Golf Ring Organizes the Ku Klux Klan No Navy=No Fight War With Japan May Have to Be Fought with Postcards Coolidge Awaits Word of Landslide Lodge Nearly Achieves Acquaintance with Ring Double-Header in Cleveland Finds Gaps in Bleachers Ring Will Run Under One Condition Women Held to Blame for Long Session Ring Defends His Socks Ring Wants Bryan Lured Away Democrats Are Out to Set New World Record Ring Knew It All Along Ring''s New Tax Bill to Include Congressmen Why I Will Vote Socialist 6. Boxing An Evening Accumulating Culture Dempsey vs. Willard Jess'' Stomach Shouldn''t Be Worried Ring''s Funny Stories Make the Operators Sick Lardner Hears Peace Trio Will Officiate at Bout After Seeing Jess in the Movies, Ring Wonders How Jack Can Win Lardner Won on Allies and Picks Willard Now When I Picked Jess to Win I Thought He''d Have Two Eyes to See With Dempsey vs.

Carpentier Getting to Know Geos. Ring Will Bear Up No Matter Who Wins Ring Gives Dry Statistics on Preparations for Fight Ring Uses Strategy to Buzz Frenchman Lots of "Trebles" at Carpentier''s Ringside Everything Goes When You Hit Dempsey''s Camp A Surprise Party for Jack Ring Sizes Up Critics from Europe How to Overcome the Shock of Battle Ring Is Glad He Wasn''t in the Ring Dempsey vs. Firpo They Ought to Spell It Furpo Theys No Doubt Wild Bull Can Hit If Jack Lets Him No More Salutes from Firpo to Sid Lardner Sees the Wild Bull Firpo Takes the Day Off Ring Discovers What''s Wrong with His Feet Ring Gives Dempsey Some Advice Lardner in Great Shape for Wordy Battle A Word from Bernard Shaw It Was a FIGHT Dempsey vs. Tunney Monosyllables to Jack''s Jaw Best Fight of Tunney''s Career Found Dempsey at His Worst 7. The Noble Experiment 1919 Prohibition Blues Some Recipes with Kicks An Ounce of Prevention The Benefits of Prohibition Oh, Shoot! 8. The America''s Cup and Other Sports Ring Can''t Stand the Excitement of Yacht Racing Yachts Sail like a Snail with Paralysis The Closest Race We''ve Slept Though Yet The Race Is Betw.