Do you go into fits of absolute apoplexy when you hear the words Eurozone, Climate Change and Foreign Aid? Do the words savoir - faire, zeitgeist and polski sklep make you feel uncomfortable and apprehensive? Do you take great comfort in familiarity and find yourself saying, 'Back in my day.', 'I remember when.' and 'Call that art?' Congratulations - you're just like me I don't just mean a thoroughly decent bloke, but also someone who's happy to speak his mind and call a spade a spade - and doesn't give a tuppenny toss whom he upsets. Within these pages you'll find my thoughts and views on a wide range of subjects, all unapologetically based on prejudice, irrationality and political incorrectness, including: a cents Why global warming is just a load of liberal hot aira cents The Metric System: Satan's measurementsa cents Why don't the Chattering Classes just shut their gobs'a cents 25 reasons why it's good to smokea cents Citizenship Test: UKIP stylea cents The European Union. Three words that carry the exact same appeal as 'Starring Hugh Grant' This book is as much about what puts the Great in Great Britain as is it is about what'swrong with foreigners and foreign policy - and how I'll make it right.".