"Unapologetically raw, defiantly humorous, this book is the bravest of journeys. From the beauty of the mountain-hemmed Utah salt flats to the terrors of a hospital bed, K.J. Ramsey invites us into her journal pages, her fears, her doubts, and her very body with a memoir that makes no promises except to tell the truth about joy in the dark. We've needed this." --Cole Arthur Riley, New York Times bestselling author of This Here Flesh "This book is a beacon, guiding us into the wild and natural worlds we exist within: the ones outside all around and the ones inside that we embody. Ramsey reminds us that no matter how rugged, surprising, and full of mystery--it is our connection with them that invites us into a life full of beauty." --Hillary McBride, PhD, psychologist, author, podcast host "This is a harrowing account of a woman who has contended with serious illness for most of her adult life.

It is also a witness to the hope that arises even in misery. 'We cannot heal our way out of being human,' Ramsey writes, but she insists that love and joy can uplift us in the spaces between our pains." --Kathleen Norris, New York Times bestselling author of The Cloister Walk "The best writing is the most honest, and K.J. Ramsey has written a memoir that tells the whole truth with all its teeth and tenderness. This is a searing and generous companion for anyone who's carried trauma, chronic illness, or the wreckage of bad religion in their body." --David Gate, author of A Rebellion of Care "An antidote to cynicism and despair in the midst of suffering, Ramsey generously offers all of us a hard-won story of how to deepen our capacity for joy, even when nothing has turned out as advertised." --Sarah Bessey, bestselling author of Field Notes for the Wilderness and editor of A Rhythm of Prayer.