Holly Dorren can't breathe. Think. Feel. Her cousin is dead. Nothing will bring him back. And nothing will ever make her whole again. In the days following Larry's funeral, Holly begins to reflect on the childhood they shared. She looks for answers in both the past and the present, convinced that understanding his fascination with death might somehow allow her to cope with his absence.

She doesn't want to disappear, but already she's fading away from the life she's led. Holly knew her cousin better than anyone, she was his best friend, and yet there is still a great deal she cannot accept in their relationship. In him. In herself. She doesn't know how to move on without him, but refusing to accept his death carries it's own devastating price.