"A thorough guide to healing the rifts caused by broken marriages. In this book, Himlin, drawing on over 30 years of experience as a licensed family therapist, acts as guide and sympathetic companion to parents going through the confusion, fear, and heartbreak of feeling cut off from their children when marriages end. "What happened?" such parents frequently ask. "Why doesn't my child want to see me anymore?" The author provides stories inspired by her work to illustrate the complexities of her subject, analyzing situations like that of young Lily, who gradually began to refuse all contact with her divorced dad because, she thought, such contact might be saddening to her mother. Children like Lily, who freeze out their parents after a split, are the main focus of Himlin's book, which acknowledges that maintaining relationships in such situations (protracted legal proceedings, acrimony between parents) can be very difficult. "Your child needs you," she urges. "If there are some tangible hurdles to jump over, it will be worth it." This note of prioritizing the needs of the children involved is sounded throughout the book, whether the author is discussing acclimating a child to a divorced parent's new home or dealing with the logistical chaos of changing schools, or, in the worst-case scenario, facing active attempts by one parent to exclude the other.

Himlin writes clear, forceful prose, evincing vibrant empathy while reminding readers of their highest priorities. "Regardless of what you think your co-parent is doing," she writes in a typical passage, "you need to focus on how you show up in your family." Despite the heightened emotions involved, she argues, parents should try to stay calm; anxiety, frustration, anger, or fear may stop them from making the best choices. For readers going through the sorts of ordeals covered here, this kind of warm, sensible advice will surely be just what they need. Practical, compassionate guidance for maintaining relationships with one's children during and after divorce." --Kirkus Reviews.